Tag Archive: failure

So Kirby wrote me this comment on my last post and my answer kind of turned into a post itself, so here it is – and thanks Kirby for the opportunity to look at this a little closer…

I want to try and comment.  First part about transition and how the kids are handling it well and even with added pressure from both of them advancing into middle and high schools you say that this time always has to be rocky for me.  Why?  Not attempting to go all deep on you but why?  Do you make it tough or you history says that it will be tough?

The last section of the post, from how I read it, seemed to have a sense of urgency or . . . high level of need.  That may not have been your intentions when writing, regardless, I still think that a simple “slow down for a second” or “take a chill pill” would work.  Does it need to be rushed?

hmm, I will pause for a second to see what the answer is about why this time is rocky, and I’ll try not to go all deep on ya either..  I think it has to do with what I think of as the shaking of the snow globe.

I’m all settled into this current way of life, just for now, all the glitter (or snow…ha ha the idea of a bunch of glitter all over my stuff is funny to me…not really a “glitter girl”..) then it gets all shaken up again.  I think it’s the up in the air-ed-ness (so not a word, but what’cha gonna do about it) is the unsettled part for me.  Also, because I don’t want to let anybody down with what I have to offer for summer (and yes, on the larger scale as well – since I know you’re going to call me out on that as well…!).

Here’s what I mean – I want to provide my kids with lots of stuff to do, but also want them to have chill time.  Like, in the right amounts of both.  So I want them to have a rad summer, and from year to year that changes, ya know, as they get older.  So I guess I have some fear that I won’t have the balance right for everyone involved.  I don’t want to disappoint anyone.  That is a big issue for me, keeping a balance and not letting anyone down, or disappoint – I’m the cruise director, basically.  Or if you look at it another way, controlling.  And the funny thing is, I’ve gotten way more chill over the past 10 years, taking more of a facilitator role than a controller roll.  But the fear is still there, that people will be disappointed with what I provide.  It’s one of the reasons I’m making this – all of this – connections through the blog, the dinners, readings, and finally classes or courses for others a much bigger part of my life.  On one hand, it feeds me, but on the other, I know whatever is being provided is perfect, because it’s not me.  I’m a channel, again a facilitator, but it’s not me.  And what it is is perfect, and where it comes from is phenomenal.  And I trust that wholeheartedly.   It’s like when ya know, you know.  And this – I know.

And to address the second part – yes I know, I need to take a chill pill.  It’s not a sense of urgency, it’s just this place where I get when I’m being flooded or overwhelmed, I become scattered and spacey, feel like some things will slip through if I don’t juggle just the right way.  And I’ve had other lessons coming up at the same time, like sidebars.  Awesome!  Just what I need, sidebars!  But actually I’m working on becoming more organized so this will get better.  I’m also clearing things out of my life that aren’t serving me, my family, my home, etc.  I’m streamlining.  I appreciate you bringing this to my attention.  For all things a season.  Just for me, I rarely am able to see what my seasons are for myself, some of the frustrations of being a SEE-ER, when turned in my eye is blind.


Facing the set back, acknowledging, and moving forward.  That is my lesson today.

Abraham Lincoln is my constant reminder that I can do anything I set my mind to, that no setback is too great.

Old Abe is on my mind today.


When I’m having it tough, hitting setbacks and feeling sorry for myself, I think of Abraham Lincoln.  Here’s why:

(I nabbed this list from School for Champions –http://www.school-for-champions.com/history/lincoln_failures.htm – if you want to learn more – there’s a little quiz at the end…thanks School for Champions!)

List of Lincoln’s failures

A common list of the failures of Abraham Lincoln (along with a few successes) is:

  • 1831 – Lost his job
  • 1832 – Defeated in run for Illinois State Legislature
  • 1833 – Failed in business
  • 1834 – Elected to Illinois State Legislature (success)
  • 1835 – Sweetheart died
  • 1836 – Had nervous breakdown
  • 1838 – Defeated in run for Illinois House Speaker
  • 1843 – Defeated in run for nomination for U.S. Congress
  • 1846 – Elected to Congress (success)
  • 1848 – Lost re-nomination
  • 1849 – Rejected for land officer position
  • 1854 – Defeated in run for U.S. Senate
  • 1856 – Defeated in run for nomination for Vice President
  • 1858 – Again defeated in run for U.S. Senate
  • 1860 – Elected President (success)


Then I think, HOLY CRAP!! If Abe can face adversity and do the things he did, what am I whining about?  Lincoln came about at such a pivotal time in our history, and created such an opportunity for so many people, as well as created some enemies of course, but look at everything he did based on ONE SIMPLE REASON:  HE DIDN’T GIVE UP.


I’ve created a Mother/Daughter workshop and thought I had a place to hold it.  I even started advertising it, then – bump in the road.  Now I’m not sure if the location is going to work out.  Well, crap.  Time to feel sorry for myself, and if this is what I’m supposed to be doing why isn’t this working out and blah blah blah.  Did that for a few minutes.  Then picked myself up and went by another location to see if that would work.  Still hoping that one will, but if not, I’ll try someplace else.  This is what I’m supposed to be doing.  Had a conversation this morning that only reinforced that  😉 .  So, I’m going to keep going, and keep on keepin’ on and make it happen.  There are connections there waiting to be made, conversations that need to happen to make OTHER conversations happen.  The ball needs to be set in motion, all it takes is one..little…push.  I wonder where we would be if Old Abe had called it a day when he lost his bid for Legislature in 1832?  I also think of how many lessons were learned in defeat that were later applied to create future success.   Now I’m not comparing myself to Abraham Lincoln, but he was just a person too.  Woke up and went to bed every day.  It’s what he did in the hours in between getting up and laying down that made the difference to so many.  So I have to ask myself, what am I doing, and I’ll ask you….what are you?

It just takes that one little…push.  Have a FREAKIN’ PHENOMENAL DAY!

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